I'm going down to South Park Gonna have myself a time
Friendly faces everywhere Humble folks without temptation
Going down to South Park Gonna leave my woes behind
Ample parking day or night People spouting, "Howdy, neighbour"
Heading on up to South Park Gonna see if I can't unwind
Come on down to South Park And meet some friends of mine
Look at Kenny's lunch. A baloney sandwich and water.
God damn, your family's poor, dude.
Hey, you fellows wanna go see High School Musical 3 tonight?
Bunch of kids from school are gonna go see it again.
What's High School Musical 3?
You know, the sequel to High School Musical 1 and 2.
What's High School Musical 1 and 2?
There's not even condiments on his baloney sandwich.
What's High School Musical 1 and...
Dude, it's only the most popular thing with kids in our age group.
Yeah. Where the hell have you guys been?
Peru.
And then I saw High School Musical 3 again on Friday,
and guess who was there. Bridon Gueermo.
Bridon Gueermo? He's such a dream.
I'd give anything to be with Bridon Gueermo.
But he'd never go for me. I'm nobody.
That's not true, Red. Everyone has something that makes them unique.
Everyone is special in their own way Move to the beat and let your spirit out
As long as we got each other We'll never have any trouble
That's what being friends is about
Oh, yeah
Everyone is special in their own way And we'll always be together as one
- What the hell are they doing? - I have no idea.
As long as we stick together Together we'll stay
And every kid in school Is special in their own way
Dude, girls are such fags.
Oh, yeah Oh, yeah
Boys! Are special in their own way
Girls! Are special like a birthday
We'll always be dancing and singing it loud
Here he comes.
I like having fun in the hot summer sun
And grooving to the beat when my homework is all done
If you ask me what I know...
- Who the hell is that? - That's Bridon Gueermo.
He's just a third-grader,
but he can sing and dance better than anybody.
He's already seen High School Musical 3 over 100 times.
Everyone is special in their own way
Special in their own way
Let your spirit out
Let it out, party people
As long as we have each other We'll never have any trouble
Are we the only ones here who are completely confused?
Yeah, I guess we better check that movie out.
You got to go with the status quo
If you wanna be a regular Joe Come on, now
And your dreams are only a beat away
Don't let them tell you no
You got to go with the status quo
Keep singing about the status quo Keep singing about the status quo
That's the phrase we know Get down now
This is cool?
And singing about what we know
This is cool? We are really getting old, you guys.
Go with the status quo
'Cause that's where you should go
It says this DVD sold more copies than any DVD ever made.
They just released Part 3 in theatres
and it made 80 million opening weekend.
Well, I'm out, guys. If this is what's cool now, I think I'm done.
I no longer have any connection to this world.
I'm gonna go home and kill myself. Goodbye, friends.
I don't care how popular being like these kids becomes. I'm not doing it.
I'm not doing it either. Kenny?
All right, we promise?
We have to swear to each other right now we'll never become this.
I swear.
Okay, good.
What happened? I thought you were gonna kill yourself.
I tried.
Went to sleep in my mom's car in the garage with the engine turned on.
But you didn't die?
Freaking hybrids, man. They just don't do the trick any more.
All right. Kids in seats. Kids in seats.
Today we are going to discuss the Berlin Wall.
This was a wall in Germany
that actually separated the communist East side and the democratic West side.
East side, West side Whatever side that you're on
As long as we care about each other We can still have some fun
Man!
Don't sweat what you might get By seeing the other side as a threat
You kids!
Neither side is right or wrong We gotta learn to all get along
East side, West side It doesn't matter to me
We gotta learn to power through And set each other free
Don't care what other people wear Or the way they like to style their hair
Neither side is right or wrong That's why we got to all get along
East side West side
God, this sucks!
East side
Do you feel like maybe you're losing her, Stan?
I don't know. There's nothing I can do about it, anyway.
Maybe you should just talk to her.
You know, a little conversation. Tell her what you feel.
Sometimes you feel like there's a burning inside you like...
- Just stop. - All righty, then.
- Wendy? - Hey, Stan.
Look, I just want you to know,
if you want to, you know, be with that Bridon kid, then you should.
- What? - I mean...
I see the way you two are together and I don't wanna be in your way.
- Stan, that's ridiculous. - It is?
- I would never leave you for Bridon. - Really?
No way. That'd be stupid.
I wouldn't have a chance with Bridon. He can be with any girl he wants.
There you go. Feel better, pal?
What am I supposed to do? I can't just sit back
and watch some kid steal my girlfriend away.
I mean, Wendy says she'd never leave me for him,
but what if she just doesn't wanna hurt my feelings?
She said he could get any girl he wants,
and that means if he wanted, he could have my girl.
This is all so crazy. I mean, really, how could my day get any worse?
No. No, I'm not doing it.
- I'm not doing it. - Come on.
No, fuck off. I'm not doing it.
That sucks.
Jeez, you're no fun.
- Hey, Bridon. - Hey.
- Hi, Bridon. - Hi.
- Hey, Bridon. - Hey, Bridon.
- Hey. - Hey, kid, over here.
Hey, listen, you know this whole singing and dancing thing you do?
I think you need to ease off a little bit.
Yeah, look, I know you think the kids in school like you,
but, actually, they're all getting really annoyed.
- They are? - Yeah, you don't know
'cause you're just a third-grader. But take it from me,
you're driving everyone crazy.
I don't blame them. All that singing and dancing.
I can't stand it.
- You don't like doing it? - It just isn't me.
What I really wanna do is just play basketball.
- Basketball? - I love it. Always have.
I never miss a game on TV, when my dad isn't making me rehearse.
I'd love to quit singing and dancing forever and just play ball.
Dude, you should do that. You should join the basketball team right now.
- I can't. - Yes, you can. What's stopping you?
It's my dad. He thinks basketball is for sissies.
If I don't do what he wants, he beats me.
No, dude, listen. You need to take a stand
- And tell your dad what you want. - Really?
When you grow up and you're a fourth-grader,
you'll understand that you have to be tough and direct with your parents.
Go to your dad and tell him you want to give up singing and dancing,
and join the basketball team.
You know, you're right. I'm gonna talk to my old man tonight.
Sweet.
Sit up properly, Bridon. You know how strict your father is about posture.
All right, dear, dinner's ready.
Okay, let's eat.
Dad, I need to talk to you about something.
That sounds emotional.
What is it, Son? What's on your mind?
Whatever it is You know your dad has the time
No, Dad, can we just talk?
If you can talk it You can sing it
You can lay down the rhythm And bring it
Just put a melody to the words that you're saying and soon you'll be...
Dad, I wanna join the basketball team.
What did you say?
This kid at school today told me I should do what I want to do.
- That's what I really want to do. - Basketball?
No son of mine is going to be a sweaty little jock.
But, Dad, it's what I really want.
There's no singing and dancing in basketball.
I know, that's kind of why I like it.
Don't you even think about it. If I had a jock for a son,
I'd be the laughing stock of the men's choir club!
- It's my life, Dad. - Don't make me slap you.
I will slap your face so super-hard...
I am the man of this house.
You disrespect me and you're gonna get slapped.
- Maybe you should let him try it. - What did you say, woman?
- You aren't being fair. - That's it! I'm gonna slap you!
No, please!
I slap you, I slap you I slap, slap, slap you
I'm slapping you, slapping you silly 'Cause you disrespected me
You guys, I need to copy your math homework before class.
You're not copying my homework, you lazy turd.
Fuck you, Kyle!
And you know We're together at school again
- School again - With all of our friends
And you know We'll be doing this forever
Oh, God. Shut up!
What a special day
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
We can say that it's never going away
Hey, kid, what happened?
I thought you didn't wanna sing and dance any more.
Yeah, well, my dad blew a gasket when I told him,
- And then he beat my mom. - Dude, what did I tell you?
You have to be tough and stand up for yourself.
Mr. Garret. Mr. Garret.
This kid wants to join the basketball team. He's really good.
- Really? - Look, I should be getting to class.
Hey, we sure could use you, kid.
I can never find enough kids that wanna play ball.
All the kids and the school funding goes to the theatre department.
You see? They need you. This is fate, kid. Fate.
- I don't know... - Look, just come in at recess
and shoot some balls with the team.
Yeah, just go in at recess and shoot some balls with the team, God damn it.
Okay.
- Hey, that's great, Bridon. - Thanks.
We might have a chance at winning now.
Bridon!
What are you doing here? What are you doing here?
Dad, I was just messing around.
I drove by the school and saw kids on the playground
doing a music number, and you weren't there!
You're here in the sports gym shooting basket hoops.
Hey, your kid is really good at this.
- Don't talk to me, stupid jock asshole! - Just go easy on him, huh?
You know what this means? It means you're about to get slapped,
so you better shut up!
If he wants to play ball you should let him.
- I'll do it. I'll slap the shit out of you. - He's just a kid.
You don't tell me how to raise my son or I'll slap it again.
Dad, stop.
You trying to turn my son into a little asshole sports person like yourself.
There, there's another slap. Maybe you'll think next time you act, you...
Slap it! I slap it!
- Dad. Dad, you're hurting me. - Shut up, Bridon.
What's going on here, Mr. Gueermo?
Get out of my way, Mackey. You want a piece of this?
I'll slap everyone in this goddamn school if I have to.
You are never going to play shooty hoops, do you understand?
You are going to sing and dance and be the best at it.
- You're hurting my arm. - Move your ass, boy!
Shit.
That's good, that's good. Yeah, shoot that guy in the face, Kyle.
Yeah, nice.
You guys, this High School Musical thing isn't gonna go away.
I think we better just get on board with it.
- What? Are you crazy? - No way, dude.
We promised each other we would never do that. Remember?
I know,
but I think we're really starting to become outcasts at school.
We're losing all our credibility.
I mean, look at who you guys are hanging out with now.
Scott Malkinson, for Christ's sake.
What's so bad about hanging out with me?
Shut up, Scott Malkinson.
"I'm Scott Malkinson. I've got a lisp and I've got diabetes."
Hey, don't make fun of my diabetes.
"Don't make fun of my diabetes. I'm Scott Malkinson."
You can rip on him, but you guys are hanging out with him.
Doesn't that make you think maybe your clout at school has slipped a little?
Stan, you're just jealous of that third-grader and you think
Wendy's gonna go for him unless you start singing and dancing, too.
That isn't true.
Okay, that's totally true.
But, you guys, we are at risk of becoming the unpopular kids.
Hey, that was supposed to be my power-up pack.
"That was supposed to be my power-up pack.
"I'm Scott Malkinson. I have diabetes."
High School Musical is so awesome
- Mr. Gueermo? - What?
We're from Child Protective Services.
There's some concern you might be physically abusing your child.
What? Who the hell's been saying that?
We got a phone call from a concerned student
- Who wishes to remain anonymous. - His name is Stan Marsh.
You better just turn your asses around and get back in your little car,
'cause there's a world of hurt about to come your way.
Mr. Gueermo, we need to come in and have a word with your son.
By all means. You got the balls to come in here, do it.
Do it.
Hello, Bridon. My name is Mr. Kelly.
We just wanted to talk to you for a few minutes, if that's okay,
and just maybe...
Yeah, there it is! Slapped you! You probably think I'm finished, huh?
- No, there's another one. - Oh, my God!
Don't worry, bitch, I didn't forget about you.
There's a slap for you! Slap! Slap! Slap!
Yeah, there you go. Here's a little reach-around-the-back-of-the-head slap.
Oh, God, please! You have to get away, he won't ever stop.
I'm going slap-happy!
I'm going slap, slap-happy
Slappety-slapping you, teaching you a lesson for coming in my house
What are you looking at, Robertson?
They're here. The audition results for the school musical are in.
Hey, you got the lead, Wendy.
- Go, Wendy! - All right, Wendy.
- Who's the male lead? - No surprise there. It's Bridon.
- All right, Bridon. - Cool, Bridon.
I get to be a stand-in.
Congratulations, Bridon. Guess we'll be working a lot together.
- Yeah, great. - God damn it.
No matter what I do, this kid just won't stop.
And now they're gonna be in a show together? Jesus, it's all over for me.
They'll probably even have a kissing scene.
What did I do to deserve this? And what am I supposed to do now?
Someone's in the kitchen with Dinah
Someone's in the kitchen, I know
Someone's in the kitchen with Dinah Strumming on the old banjo
And going fee, fi, fiddly-i-o Fee, fi, fiddly-i-o
Strumming on the old banjo
Jo, jo Go tell Aunt Rhodie
Go tell Aunt Rhodie
The old grey goose is...
Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to...
...hear the rhythm Now is the time, the time!
It's time to go to bed Yes, time to call it a day
You can reach the stars
Please. You have to do something!
- What are you interrupting me for? - It's our son. He's running away!
What?
What's going on here? What's this all about?
What do you think you're doing?
Dad, I'm sick of you trying to always...
- No, no. Sing it! - No! I'm sick of singing.
Can you believe it? What'd he just say? What's the matter with kids these days?
- Kids these days - Kids these days
Just go right back to your room and sing a ballad, mister.
- Just let me go. - Go ahead, make my day.
You get upstairs or I will slap you
until there's little red hand prints all over your face.
Oh, my God, what was that?
Did you see that? Oh, my God, it hurt so bad.
What the H is going on?
What are you doing? Everyone's crazy.
- Well, I had to see it to believe it. - I told you guys.
He's been watching High School Musical
over and over again.
Actually, this is High School Musical 2. It has a dance-along part.
We said we wouldn't be a part of this fad and look at you.
Look, you guys might be fine with being outcasts
and hanging out with Scott Malkinson, but I'm not.
You know what, at least Scott Malkinson has some self-respect.
At least Scott Malkinson doesn't cave in to peer pressure
and start doing musicals.
Scott Malkinson has a lisp and diabetes. Nobody's gonna let him do a musical.
That's enough, you guys. It's not cool.
Lots of kids have diabetes, and you shouldn't be...
"You shouldn't rip on kids with diabetes. That's not cool. I'm Scott Malkinson."
Look, guys, the world is changing.
We can't fight it. We have to change with it.
I've been watching these movies, and from the looks of it,
there's going to be a lot more singing and dancing
when we get to high school. And if you think we'll gain any respect
by ignoring this thing and being individuals,
then think about this.
Right now, everyone thinks Butters is way cooler than any of you.
That's a low blow, Stan.
Third team foul on West Jeff Bobcats, m'kay. Ball goes back over to the Cows.
All right, you ready to get in there, Bridon?
- I'm ready, Coach. - Give them hell.
Just a minute to go in the first quarter.
We will, we will rock you
We will, we will...
Hey, Bridon, how come you weren't at musical rehearsals last night?
I joined the basketball team. I gave up singing and dancing forever.
- I'm just not into it. - You gave it up?
That's right. You know,
sometimes you just have to go with what your heart tells you.
There's things we're all good at,
and we can't just keep them bottled up inside.
'Cause you got to do what you wanna do
Don't let nothing get in your way Chase your dream every day
True, girl, you know it's true
That if you really wanna be you You gotta do what you wanna do
He was unhappy 'Cause he just wanted to play ball
But he finally got the courage To answer his heart's call
Just like me, all I ever wanted Was to sing and dance
And now that I stood up for my dream I finally have the chance
You gotta do what you wanna do
Even if other people Don't really want you to
True, girl, you know it's true That the thing you want to do
Is the thing that you should do
Some kids think I'm strange 'Cause I like studying for an exam
But I don't let that bother me Because it's who I am
And I like nothing better Than making fun of Jews
And ripping on black people Though some people think it's rude
But you got to do what you wanna do
Just make sure that what you're doing
Is what's cool and popular with everyone else
Chew, baby, chew and chew
Hey, Bridon, can we watch you practise basketball?
Sure.
Do what you do Don't have restraint
Don't stress about it Or you just might faint
You gotta do what you wanna do
Do what you wanna do
As long as what you wanna do Is what everybody wants you to
Glue, baby, buy some glue Just in case what you're doing
Hey, guys! Hey, guys!
Where'd everybody go?
The girls all wanted to go watch that Bridon kid practise basketball.
But the girls like singing and dancing.
No, I think the girls just like that Bridon kid. No matter what he does.
But... No, we just... No, no wait, we just got good at this!